Friday, August 08, 2008

Saw my father tonight on the way to a group meeting / outing in Berkeley. I assume he was leavening work. He ran across the street to correspond with me than used the Fargo atm. I did not have any reason to commutate with him, or invite him to where I am going.

Mainly due to trust issues, and I don’t know him and am unsure if I want him in my life. Its not that I am unwilling to go to family counseling and talk about our distrust, portrayal and anger. He told me to back off and someone running across the street to talk to me, whom told me a few days ago corresponding with him or others would be viewed as harassment is a paradox and conflict in itself.

The only reason I contacted individuals (through face book) was again to attempt to have an unbiased or natural 3rd party to attempt to build a relatshinship with. Which I am willing but I am unwilling to put myself in a sticky suction on a public street and cause myself more problems outside the Downtown Berkeley Bart station, I also had memories of my childhood in the downtown Berkeley library. Comeback, and had some cheap hole in the wall Chinese food. A guilty carnivore pleasure.

Look forward to the support group and more of life to come and the road ahead, going to have to research more east bay meeting places for next time.

I am willing to go to Family heryuep with him maybe evne his new wife, at a LBGT coucnelingpalce, and marriage and family counter,. I also know my father reads my blog regularly as well.
Im even open to going to the pacific center if he is truly willing to have contact with me, than he is more than able to contact me, the doors are open but I distrust him on a street corner approaching me.

In addition, Yes I am angry at him, but would I hurt him no, I shoved him aside in sprit as far as I am concerned he died in the early 1980s when my mother left California. I do want to get to know and have him in my life, but I don’t trust him
--
Lee McInnis Gaetjens
Ind Contractor / Web Mistress leemcg.com
PO Box 425081
San Francisco, CA 94142
mcinnisleegaetjens@gmail.com
(713) 578-0016
http://mlgaetjens.livejournal.com (blog)
http://mlgaetjens.photobucket.com (photos)
http://www.leemcg.com/ (Website)
http://www.transitioningfemale.com/ (blog simulcast untill transfered to moveable type)
mlgaetjens- yahoo messenger
mlgaetjens2038 - aim/aol messenger