5/4/08

The reality of Life, is not life it self, I found another sponsor, I want the insanity to end, I want recovery, the answer is to recovery is I dont, know. I just know what I dont want, I dont have the answers, but I find them more and more one day at a time, the fear of relpase, is not an option.

I have a somewhat busy upcoming week, I have school matters to deal with and tend to, I have some sinus problems, I feel a bit more recovered, I also need some time to work out my issues, My hair is fixed, and the currls are back again

I picked up some hygine things yesterday at my trip to the walgreens, I also have a meeting on the adgenda this morning, I ate some yougert, and am going on a new diet within reason, as well. I also am going to do more walking again, clearing my throughts in recovery.

I need to back down and stay away, I dont want more resentments and hurt, I also admited I was wrong in what I said to another TG person recently about her, and her drug uses, But I admited over reaction to an addict, I offered a meeting book, she refused, but I made pace, and made ammends, one day at time.

I know CAN be a cold blooded, selfish bitch, and very nasty, mean and minupipulative but at least, I find faut in my defects, I met someone, and I also have a new sponsor, that I feel comfortable with.,

I have some medical things, and therpey apointments this week as well and much more to do, Ive just be so very busy, I am going to turn in early tonight, and get a good workout.

Maybe read and also work on some PHP before going to bed, for the night. I also might work on my INTRANET, on my other server a bit, where I keep my life in order, and have a lot of personal information stored offsite.

I also have other things to work on, I am a bit sick and dizzy, I also figured out where the largest ANTI equity progressive church is located in San Francisco.

I also got a few respnoces from various ads I am running currently, I also composed a few other factors, and letters more recently as well

--
Lee McInnis Gaetjens
Ind Contractor / Web Mistress leemcg.com
PO Box 425081
San Francisco, CA 94142
mcinnisleegaetjens@gmail.com
(713) 578-0016
http://mlgaetjens.livejournal.com (blog)
http://mlgaetjens.photobucket.com (photos)
http://www.leemcg.com/ (Website)
http://www.transitioningfemale.com/ (blog simulcast untill transfered to moveable type)
mlgaetjens- yahoo messenger
mlgaetjens2038 - aim/aol messenger

life in sickness, and growth and myself

11/08/07

Got more rest, still sick off and on. The fever and cough have gone to just sinus. Still takeing meds, to try and get better. The cold is bad. Went to 6 meetings this week, 3 in one day. Achived a very good understanding of steps 4,5 etc. and soon but not quite adjusting to them. Still working hard.

Awoke early this morning at 5am was out the door early, the cold and sinus made me dizzy and went back to bed at 6:45 am and rested, the sinus is better, I was so dizzy I had trouble driving. I went to rest at home.

Received my new county tax sticker today, and applied it to the auto, some of my tailgate parts came in the mail yesterday, slept more today. Awoke, running errands, lost a lot of weight and still well looseing. I can feel my body getting lighter, I am looseing weight again. Ill be ideal down to 160 or so soon if this keeps up.

11/08/07

Got more rest, still sick off and on. The fever and cough have gone to just sinus. Still takeing meds, to try and get better. The cold is bad. Went to 6 meetings this week, 3 in one day. Achived a very good understanding of steps 4,5 etc. and soon but not quite adjusting to them. Still working hard.

Awoke early this morning at 5am was out the door early, the cold and sinus made me dizzy and went back to bed at 6:45 am and rested, the sinus is better, I was so dizzy I had trouble driving. I went to rest at home.

Received my new county tax sticker today, and applied it to the auto, some of my tailgate parts came in the mail yesterday, slept more today. Awoke, running errands, lost a lot of weight and still well looseing. I can feel my body getting lighter, I am looseing weight again. Ill be ideal down to 160 or so soon if this keeps up.

I ate eggs this morning. And took ok care of myself. I cleaend up need to run to the hardware store, more and grow more I have to pick up some bolts, and some things for my truck, this weekend I hope a Oil change is in order if I am feeling up to it.

The nightmares have stoped, discovered they were from some gel tabs, that made me feel tipys and drunk and became more careful slecting cold meds, it brings out the vampire in you or the beast of the devil.

I have some chores to run and do at home.

Yesterday, I discovered that why others had to wipe their hands of me. I had to do that to someone I did some service and sponsorship and help for. You cant let someone else drain you and drag you down. It was hard but it was in the best intrest for this indiduval who is as sick as I am in recovery at one time, it hurt but I had to do what I had to do for whats best for them and myself.

I had to cancel my affair this morning, and have an apointment tommorow and other things to do. I am sick off and on and growing more and more.

I have some chores to run and do at home.

--
Lee McInnis Gaetjens
Ind Contractor / Web Mistress leemcg.com
PO Box 66471
Houston, Texas 77266-6471
mcinnisleegaetjens@gmail.com
(713) 578-0016
http://mlgaetjens.livejournal.com (blog)
http://mlgaetjens.photobucket.com (photos)
http://www.leemcg.com/ (Website)
http://www.transitioningfemale.com/ (blog simulcast untill transfered to moveable type)