Updates and Lesbian Baby Mamma Drama

Friday, January 09, 2009

My discovery about something about myself and discovering more about life. People and my therapist is correct I am strange, I don’t have emotions of feelings or just bottle them up, and shove the crap aside. I’ve been watching someone in the San Francisco Transgender Community break free of addiction, and even have some admiration given her and I got into it before, she really has some a long way.

I love to hate San Francisco and the Bay Area. For example, some of my viewpoints are a bit radical, as for advocating the incarnations of drunks, drug addicts, and allow individuals when they get out choosing the first step. Many San Francisco Residents also defer from my viewpoints on firearms, and right to use force.

Moreover, I have discovered about myself, and my life. It’s not that I am emotionless, I just don’t display it. I am more of a quiet, but outgoing, individual. I prefer my privacy and solitude. It is amazing I look so much like my mother in Transition.

Also, I am aware the day will come where and when I will Lose DLG, I think I would and will go to Louisiana just for the funereal, and then turn around and come back to California. I remember the road trip I took in 2006, to San Francisco. Its amazing taking vacation time from work, and going to Party in New Orleans than driving to San Francisco from Houston after partying in new Orleans for the weekend.

Nevertheless, I honestly don’t know how I drove from Houston to San Francisco, on truck stop coffee, bad fast food, and the open highway without resting than sleeping for a day and a half at the Becks Motor Lodge’s

I have a vague recollection of a relapse on a Sparks Entergy drink, unknowing that it had booze And recollections of mimosas, draft beer, red wine, screwdrivers. I seem to remember a disagreement of some sort with my father, which pushed him over the edge.

I don’t have all the answers, but know I must co-exist with others, and that at times is a challenge for me. I suppose, maybe it’s others un-intentional discrimination or using improper pronouns.
Yesterday I observed two individuals in a coffee shop, which I love to people watch, in coffee shops, airports, diners, public places. A girl was discussing with her male friend about her brother who is nineteen, very independent and also dealing with gender issues,
I found great amusement that he never had any friends, was a loner, and went home than left, he worked at star bucks, but what amused me is he lived with his aunt who is a lesbian, and also she referred to her as “he”. She does not quite get it.

I listened to Jayna and Mias, Podcast, which is wonderful, and I enjoy listing to, I heard names and other community leaders I have not heard in a long time. Eventually Ill get on the podcasting, and video blogging wagon, but I prefer writing, maybe I’m a bit old fashioned and sometimes late adopter.


I enjoyed hearing names of wonderful Trans-folk whom are transitioning or have transitioned, Names I heard when I was in high school or fresh out like Marty Aberthnay and some of Transponder episode 100 made me think and re-think the primary purpose of my website, blog and other reasons.
I chose to launch it to make a reality style “real-world / big brother” clone of my transition, feelings, and life experiences. I launched it because I wanted to show the world that we are not all sex craved sex workers, or psychopaths. I wanted to also document my life experiences, where friends, near and far away can monitor me, and check in at any time.

But also I launched the site to protest something unjust, which I can see my part in it. A little over a year ago, I made a difficult choice and series of difficult choices. I chose to leave Houston, start over, I learned that your past and things do follow you if you don’t change things.

I found some intresting trends in my server logs, some of which I will share later. It appears I have some curious visitors from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I have been posting as of late on some forums.

Moreover, I thought I would blog about the Oakland Riots the even if the officer was wrong, the individuals that were attempting to start a race war, and riot between cops and civilians were wrong, ever more ignorant is the fact the majority of the small businesses, companies, and other places that were vandalized were run by African American’s , Asians and other minority groups.

Even worse, the cars they smashed it has been documented some of them belonged to African Americans by local media accounts, I think the Oakland police handled the situation well by arresting only the most dangerous and those escalating violence from accounts I witnessed and media reports, it was handled well,
but the mayor of Oakland is partly to blame, for not acting sooner until blood spilled on the streets of Oakland, he should resign he is a poor leader. Anyway today around noon im going to head home and clean up and turn in early, I have a very long and busy day ,and next week is booked very tightly as well.

Moreover, I have not recently had time to work on my domain TGSFO.com, I also have to get up early to meet with my sposor, a AA service commitment, and a few other things, its been a few days without a meeting but I have been reading my big book and 12x12 book.



Next week I need to
1.) Go take care OF business in the federal building
2.) Go to the doctor
3.) Make some work in my living situation
4.) Go to my wonderful therapist
5.) FEDEX the keys to DLG to something
6.) Send the letter changing my name on my truck loan
7.) Take care of some finance issues
8.)
The List
1.) Pick up items at Walgreens
2.) Pick up mail at mailbox
3.) Take a good shower I need to do some grooming and have some hardships in my living suit ion for the next few months, and have to make some changes
4.) Pay my settlement with one of me debtors and creditors
5.) Change my name on my auto loan
6.) A


Gratitude List’
1.) Grateful to have made amends, and potential friendship with a trans-woman of African descent whom we had bad blood
2.) For being able to talk about issues
3.) For having money in the bank, food, clothing and shelter during tough economic times
4.) For having friends, and friends in aa, even if Im alone often
5.) For doing step work with my sponsor



I thought I was also note I added new photos to my photo bucket account and I watched with mild amusement of someone expelling Tran sexuality to me and than Shockley noticed me, and was kind and corrected herself, when I gave her a look, and she initial didn’t notice me, and corrected herself, she seemed to have a understanding of some personal sort, this was in amusement on the MUNI metro this morning.


You can view the new photos at this URL http://s121.photobucket.com/albums/o211/mlgaetjens/?start=all
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Leigh "LEE" McInnis Gaetjens
Ind Contractor / Web Mistress leemcg.com
PO Box 425081
San Francisco, CA 94142
mcinnisleegaetjens@gmail.com
(713) 578-0016
http://mlgaetjens.livejournal.com (blog)
http://mlgaetjens.photobucket.com (photos)
http://www.leemcg.com/ (Website)
http://www.transitioningfemale.com/ (blog simulcast untill transfered to moveable type)
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