I take not offense to others insecurity's and my own, being over-judgmental and be more alntical in the world, change does not happen over night, but I need change and change in life, and scenery and to stick it out with a fresh start. Maybe I have to deal with the inner bitch.
I found the inner peace within myself and have grown more to be myself and into peace, and mediation I have started using, but one of my feelings is Maybe I can work out and I know it all will in the end. This week the 13th on top of that the fucking drag auction is this week, and I hate fucking cross dressers, transsexual prostrates. But sometimes those you resent can teach you the most, those you dislike can teach you more.
Maybe I just need to ponder more on the present instead of the past, grow and bloom. I had a wonderful time with a bunch of fag hags recently at Mexican restraint and some of the memories of what I did wrong, and what I didn't do wrong grew more. But I'm dealing with it one day at time, more and more. And coping. I found I learned something do on to others as you would do to yourself, and things will prosper, let go free as a bird I fly into the sky as my true self.
I love myself kinda, maybe sorta I have some warm fuzzy feeling again in spirit, but sober. And when I wasn't or was a dry drunk, I know one thing, I wanted help but was to afraid to seek. It as much as I don't fucking want to I'm going to be stuck in those rooms of 12-step programs for the rest of my life, when I went from a social drinker, to a drunk here in Houston I changed myself forever.
--Lee McInnis Gaetjens
Ind Contractor / Web Mistress leemcg.com
PO Box 66471
Houston, Texas 77266-6471
mcinnisleegaetjens@gmail.com
(713) 578-0016
http://mlgaetjens.livejournal.com (blog)
http://mlgaetjens.photobucket.com (photos)
http://www.leemcg.com/ (Website)
http://www.transitioningfemale.com/ (blog simulcast untill transfered to moveable type)
Posts
No comments:
Post a Comment