Monday, February 11, 2008

02/11/08



Ive been a bit of a bitch lately not working my program, I went to a meeting this morning a early morning GLBT meeting. I'm a bit pissed about my stalker, but I am not going to let that run my life.

I made closure and letting go, for my prior transgressions against various people, groups, and things in Houston.


My sponsor wanted me to read a page in the 1st chapter before I go to bed, and to wake up and do over the 1st step, I have a meeting commitment today, I did laundry, and did not go to the Trans gender support meeting at TARC today, which has been canceled sometimes at the last minute, my cold is over its warming up now I need warmer clothes and a few changes, ive been hard on the denim lately. I also did laundry at the queer laundry mat that has wonderful gas dryers reminds me of the graustark laundry in Houston.


I also have a meeting commitment tonight, and being a bitch lately though reading those pages, and reading the 1st step in the 12+12 helped me, I got a bit done even with my meeting commitment, I need to follow up with morris about the affairs. I also am going to diet and eat less drink more coffee half regular and decaf when I drink to much I turn into a bitch.


My cold is over though a few folks are still sick, its becomeing to be skirt and legging weather here. I also have a shower to take tomorrow at the drop in center, had a causal dinner with some nice girls over the weekend, and have my appointment with the collage admissions officer.


Ate a peace of pie today my sweet tooth, and had a two cups of coffee. And a diet coke. Thats it for today, I am loosening weight. I also have a doctors appointment today at the TG clinic as well, I also have a therapy appointment with my Theresita on Thursday and a commitment to set up for queers crack pots and fallen women at the Alano club for 5 and than have to hustle down to the clinic, and don't want to bounce around town and want to relax.


I admit some jelious of my ex (stupidly I dated here for less than a day) shes a abusive, arrogant trans gender version of the old me, the me that folks were in Houston, though not as bad, her poison is not booze, but pot, lsd and even heaver shit and a little booze.


Theres also this friend, who has a abusive partner, and she drinks I wish I could help folks, but you cant force someone to change that doesn't want it, I wonder why me, why do I have the mental clarity, why do I struggle why did I fuck my life up and start over.


Some creepy guy at the Castro country club, keeps sending me his dick photos, hes on my e-mail block list. Nasty fuck. I also have been hoeing to bump with the nice butch officer to discuss things about my stalker, and talked to a few. My ex formerly has someone who's suckered into it. And ether does drugs or not, has a partner in crime. I have realized I want stability, sobriety and lack of com unite, move up in the hills with a f-350 and huge 5th wheel with laundry and loaded. Be a full time river, maybe even get a motorcycle


But thats years down the road, and have a huge Germain Sheppard or husky. I want something where I can telecommutie, have a stable job, good money and be free to fire up my pickup truck and travel. A big f-350 crew cab long bed 4x4 diesel king ranch with the fx4 off road package. And nice 40 foot 5th wheel with slides and laundry and fully equipped and nice dieing room its good to have dreams. I am tired of roughing it and the insanity I want to settle down, life in the fast lane needs to go bye bye.



I have to get busy in a few hours and need to relax,I might go to the country club, but Ill probably go to the community center, theres a cheap Chinese place some nice lady got me addicted to, thats take out near Castro and 16th or something like that.


But much to do, and I have time and sobriety I did some job applactions and hunting a bit today, and composed a letter I have to e-mail to DLG as well as mail the keys and other factors for the road trip away, far away. When I go back down south to fire up my pick-em' up truck and let the horses go to san Francisco.

--
Lee McInnis Gaetjens
Ind Contractor / Web Mistress leemcg.com
PO Box 66471
Houston, Texas 77266-6471
mcinnisleegaetjens@gmail.com
(713) 578-0016
http://mlgaetjens.livejournal.com (blog)
http://mlgaetjens.photobucket.com (photos)
http://www.leemcg.com/ (Website)
http://www.transitioningfemale.com/ (blog simulcast untill transfered to moveable type)

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