03/05/08

Today Ive had it, I am tired of things people, and places and things though powerless over, I am tired of drinking, its my time, time to die. And Ive made peace, with my maker, or so I feel like.

The agony is I was chosen to live, and know I am making the right path, I should be dead but I am not, I want life and choice and things, are happening but slowly.

I had my feelings hurt and the anti-depressants are upsetting me I suppose.

Maybe I'm just moody, or bitchy about other things, I don't know. I am tried of being hurt and having my feelings hurt.

But in the end, Ill be ok I'm sure of that of my own personal jesus just kicked up life a notch, and I had a personal experience, sometimes I think folks, are just nice to me by not being brutally honest or shareing folks and things, I also think folks are dishonest with me on some issues.

I also think I need to be more selective in what, who and where I share things with maybe to some degree in my blog. I also discovered more about myself, and life and progress and enlightenment within my soul.

I talked to PMG, sent DLG an e-mail, and composed more and more about life, and my chapter to my own gnostic. I also learned more about my insecurity's, cause, effect of pushing folks away from my depression, anti-depression and self-parenting. I read my big book today, and did some of my homework per my current sponsors request.

Currently, I am going to work on being less self-centered, optometric, and secure in myself, life and positive relationships, and being more assertive, and think before I act, react and plan my life out more.

I have an apointment at the collage, to start on aug 15^th, I also have an apointment with the GLBT center on campus. I also am going to fly back before than to move my pick em truck, and let 350 Horse Power run and let the lone star shine out to the queer side of the bay

I am looking at bank accounts given my priamry bank doesnt have branchs out here, I also composed other parts, I had a werid call recently that was unaudiable. I also had my feelings hurt by someones trans-phobia as well. I also have to stop by the post office and check mail today.

I have to drive to space city and go back and take care of other issues. I also am going to receve about my settlement, pay debits, and maybe after I finmsh a year or so of school 9in the CS / CIS program go back and get a mac.

I also composed a new line of code for my site, let go, and did my homework today at the coffee shop, I also called

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Lee McInnis Gaetjens
Ind Contractor / Web Mistress leemcg.com
PO Box 425081
San Francisco, CA 94142
mcinnisleegaetjens@gmail.com
(713) 578-0016
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