progress and finding zen and the art of motorcycles

Monday, November 24, 2008

The reality of life is as I ride Bart this morning, I grow more as a young woman. I have good, bad and ugly sets of life experiences to grow upon. I continue to make my weekly treks for my doctor’s appointment to Oakland for transition related work, and to Berkeley for the injuries I incurred while being a wild 24,25, 26 year old party club girl.

In that Process, I hurt some wonderful individuals, other trans-women and have some shame about that. I also came to believe, that the growth of my past transgressions, my father says I am a “brave individual” to be going forward with transition daily, I get missed, and mamed more and more.

I hate all the Trans chases, and the word tranny, it’s disgusting to us as women, and degrading much as nigga, or nigger is for African American individuals in the rap culture. Furthermore, stating my utterly high standards of whom I choose to associate with.

Furthermore, I grow daily as an individual perhaps, if and when and if I ever do return to Texas, It will be under more indel- cirmstances. Il have my shit together. Nevertheless, I’ve always dreamed of the city of angels, or Portland, or Seattle.

I as a woman, have goals to achieve to get out of disgusting, lazy, bum city, san Francisco. Some could argue I am a bum, but I made hard choices, I lost my truck by choice, I lost my house in Harvey, LA. I walked away from a lot and took a trip based on faith and the so called California dream

Nevertheless, I dislike being packed into the nation’s most populous state, seeing the drunks, bums, junkies, and other ultra disgusting things that are accepted in the city and county of San Francisco. I dislike having to watch out for some dumb junkie who left their needle out.

I dislike being crammed into a closet. San Francisco serves my needs at the present. The right choices are not always the easiest ones. The reality of life serves me well and my life experiences.

In addition I still have dreams of living in Montana, or Wyoming.
--
Leigh "LEE" McInnis Gaetjens
Ind Contractor / Web Mistress leemcg.com
PO Box 425081
San Francisco, CA 94142
mcinnisleegaetjens@gmail.com
(713) 578-0016
http://mlgaetjens.livejournal.com (blog)
http://mlgaetjens.photobucket.com (photos)
http://www.leemcg.com/ (Website)
http://www.transitioningfemale.com/ (blog simulcast untill transfered to moveable type)
mlgaetjens- yahoo messenger
mlgaetjens2038 - aim/aol messenger